I know that sounds pretty odd to say, but it's the truth. It isn't even that I wanted or didn't want them before, I just never had the option.
Growing up in Winter Springs, Florida was quite nice and I don't regret being a part of that community....there just wasn't a whole lot of diversity and although I am fine to be who I have come to be regardless of what other people think, I feel a tiny bit less than perfectly well-rounded. I'm lucky to have had parents who liked everyone easily enough(for the most part) and only made their issues on a few cultural differences rather than ones based on color or status. It was more of a "These Americans and their...." which to me, was a much better alternative to some of the things I later heard from people at college that were clearly developed among families and communities who felt like somehow it was far better to interact with mostly just people who were like you. Everyone has their prejudices and all of them are things we could do without.......but I certainly never felt at all disadvantaged to be an American despite the occasional comment.
Returning to the statement concerning black friends...
I never really had much positive exposure to the black community not only because it wasn't super available, but also because I wasn't readily accepted among them because of my mannerisms and upbringing. I "spoke too proper" or "dressed like a white guy." I even "sat with all the white people."
I never really understood what was so wrong with any of that...I mean why would I go out of my way to go sit with people I don't know when I can sit with these people right here who I live next to? They're the ones laughing at my jokes, the ones inviting me over to play nintendo. Does it really matter all that much?
Speaking too proper? I thought english was just english. I'm just saying the words like they are in the books that we are all reading. Do your textbooks come in some other dialect? My parents speak with accents from their home countries....that doesn't mean that I have to too.
If everyone is wearing Arizona jeans and graphic T's, then wouldn't it make sense for me to wear them also? It never occured to me to look up what other black people around the country are wearing to school. Why? because I didn't think like that. I didn't see myself as different and as far as I knew, neither did anyone else. I sure didn't feel different. I can't be completely sure that I didn't miss something crucial, but I'm willing to bet everything I needed to learn, I learned one way or another. So basically all the focus and time that people were wanting me to spend on being aware of my color was lost on me...I just didn't see it. If anything, I thought it was pretty mean the way some of the other black people would make fun of me and act like I was some sort of disgrace....and also interesting how many of those same people were suddenly fine after I sang at some of the school events.
I am really not pressed about it and am quite fine to have anyone quality, as a friend. I just am amused at evenings like tonight where the entire group of us were some sort of black. I doubt that anyone white says to their group "whoa guys look around....we're all white!" Maybe I'm just making up for lost time or something....perhaps some sort of asthetic mental checklist, lol. Really, though, I'm just glad to have friends that aren't idiots...friends that can have fun and be comfortable and make others feel so too. friends that can discuss interesting issues and still have room for joking and light-hearted conversation.
When it comes down to it, I'm so glad to have
